District Writing Assessment Page

Spring 2013

Assuming Things Creates Many Problems

Author’s Note: This piece is my spring district writing assessment. The topic that I am writing about is how as humans, we can’t assume anything in life. I am going to be connecting several life scenarios to a short story in literature. Look for an overall improvements in this piece from my district piece in the fall. I am going to work on the correctly using commas and colons in my writing. 

Our brain is contently taking on many different tasks. Sometimes they are very large tasks and sometimes they are small. When the brain takes in several smaller tasks at one time, it sometimes bypasses the task and just assumes that someone knows how to do the specific task or that it will get done on its own.  Often times in life people assume things when they just can’t. Sometimes the thought of assuming can turn out to be a good thing, but most of the time it goes wrong. Assuming that something will get done or that you are right is a poor habit that many people in this country have, and due to people assuming things major events have occurred that have ended up costing people their lives.  

In our country, the President is a major political figure and popular name. In office, the President has a major responsibility on his hands; he has to take care of our country through good times and bad. Some people aren’t happy with how the President runs the country, and that causes people to make threats on the life of the President.  Today these threats are taken very seriously, but back in the 1800’s they weren’t. Though, back in the mid 1800’s, we assumed that the President was save and that no one would want to assassinate him. It was not until 1865 when the first assassination of a President occurred.  Within the next 40 years, two more Presidents would get assassinated in office.  The assassination of President Kennedy in 1963 was the turning point of security for the President.  From this day on, lots of money would be spent to help keep the President safe wherever he is.  Assuming that the President is safe has caused a lot of trouble; four lives have been taken, but the security has improved and now we know that the President is safer than ever.   

The safety of the President is always something that people used to assume, but for a while people assumed that sporting events and local places were safe too. It was back in the day when people could go to a professional sporting event or to the local gathering place and not have to worry about anything.  But now because of all of the violence in the world, you cannot go to a professional sports game without being searched for some sort of weapon. Just recently, there was the bombings at the Boston Marathon. This tells you that supporting a runner on the streets of Boston isn’t safe anymore. Also, threats have been made of bombing the Olympics, so there has been an increased amount of security at these events.  Plus fans have gotten beaten up and shot after sporting events, and the injuries have been very severe and sometimes fatal. Recently there was a shooting outside the Empire State Building in New York City. Several people were injured and killed.  This occurred in broad daylight on the streets of the most populated city in our country.  Times have changed, the development of weapons has changed, and now many places that we love to go to are no longer safe.  

The short story “Humans are Different” has the a similar theme of don’t assume anything. The story is about a robot who is on a field trip to an inner planet.  There, the robot meets the last human ever to exist. The robot and the human grow to become good friends during their time together.  But one day the human gets sick. The robot said that he would try to fix the human. So the robot tried to fix him as if he was a robot, by performing the steps of fixing the robot on the human. The robot jammed a needle into the back of the human’s neck. The human turned off, like the robot planned. Then robot opened the human up and realized that the human was built different inside. The robot ended up killing the human, when he didn’t mean to. The robot assumed the human was built the same way he was, so he tried fixing him as if he was a robot, and it ended up costing him a good friend.   

In our daily lives, there are too many times that people make assumptions. Whether they assume that someone else will get the report done, or make the catch in baseball they assume that the specific task will get done by another person. Too often your brain gets overwhelmed with thoughts that are both big and small. Your brain makes assumptions with the smaller thoughts, so it can make room for the more important tasks. It is always important to confirm that you are right instead of assuming, because if you don’t something could go wrong.

 Fall 2012

Climbing Harney Peak

Harney Peak is 7,242 feet and is the highest point in South Dakota and east of the Rocky Mountains.  And I am actually going to make an attempt at climbing this.  There is no way in my mind that I was going to be able to climb this.  Especially because it is all uphill.  Being able to say that I accomplished it is worth bragging about, especially because we will be climbing this in high 80’s and low 90’s in temperature.  I have heard from different people that making this climb is a willing experience so I am determined to make the difficult climb.

A cool breeze greets us at the trail-head, numerous people gather around by the steel board looking for the correct trail distance that they were going to climb.  We picked the shortest trail that was possible.  It was 3.6 miles one way. The longest direction possible was over six miles one way, so that was the rout that we wanted to avoid.  As we start making the journey towards the peak I tend to take glances up to see where the peak was.  But the trick was, you could not see it.  Large rock formations blocked it’s presence.

Small twigs and falling leaves covered the path as we made our way toward Harney Peak.  The trail map that we received stated that this trail was not strenuous so a whole lot of effort will not be needed to put into this.  My joints come together and my knees bend as we climb the first hill on the trail.  Good, we all made it up but I bet there will be harder ones coming up.  As we continue along there is a opening between some trees where a lot of people are chatting and snapping photos.  We walk over and see what the reasoning was.  And sure enough there was a large rock formation kind of close in our direction.  I am one person who would take a picture at every chance that I got so obviously I got out my camera and took some photos of the view that lie in front of us.

After the photo opportunities we continued our hike.  We were about one mile in so there is a lot of stress on our legs as we continue to climb.  It is fascinating because when we would stop for a small drink the same people would pass us, and when they would get a drink then we would pass them.  I still cannot see where the top of Harney Peak is but it must be out there somewhere.  There was not a lot of uphill climbing until about the two mile mark.  It was almost like we would go up on very steep hills, and if it was not a hill, then it would be rocks that are set as stairs.  You could certainly tell that you were getting higher and higher because it was slightly getting harder to suck in air. 

We are very close to the top of the peak, people are coming down from the top and saying that it is a beautiful view.  That certainly kept me motivated to keep going up.  It is stair after stair keeping your head down at the ground watching where you are going so you do not trip and fall.  There are numerous areas where there is not tree cover and you can just see blankly out into the country side. 

We are almost to the top, the pressure building of us only having to a little over one tenth of a mile.  We can see the top, it is a small building that is made of medal.  We are on what looks to be the final set of rock stairs, one by one we make the way up to what looks like a courtyard that is paved with cement with rocks along the sides replicating benches.  By time we are up to the top it is about 11:30 AM.  We feel that now would be the right time to get out our lunches.  Lunch was very delicious, I had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with extra peanut butter some chips, grapes and a water.  Once we all finish up, we climb the last set of actual stairs to the top of Harney Peak.

The wind is howling in your face, blowing hats off heads and hair in every direction wrecking today’s style.   It is quite a view from up here, you can look out and see thousands of miles in each direction.  There was a sign that stated that if you look to the east the farthest you can see is Wisconsin.  I never thought that I would get this high in the air without being on a plane.  What was kind of funny was you could not see where we started from when we were at the top.  There are rock formations that you  can walk on and explore.  And with the ok of an adult, I set out onto the rocks.  It is a very jagged surface, you always need to watch your footing so you don’t slip and fall.  Along with falling you would scrape up a knee.  We had our family photo taken several times up there but you cannot stay there forever.  So we started our way down, back to where we started.

In conclusion, we all got up and back from climbing Harney Peak.  Sure there were some sore legs in the end but it was worth it.  I did not believe in myself but I overcame the fear and hiked up it.  Once we got back we went into a gift shop and bought a shirt that said “ I climbed Harney Peak” for all four of us.  So it can be our turn to brag that we climbed it.  It is definitely a challenge but it is worth it in the end.  It is one of the things that you should do when you are out west in South Dakota.  All in all, don’t you want to say that you have climbed Harney Peak.  I can.

Spring 2012                               

Reading Response

Author’s Note:  This is my second writing piece for the district writing assessment.  This is going to be a reading response to the book Peace like a River.  This will be a response to the modes of literature. Look at how far I have come from the fall of 2011 to the spring of 2012. In this analysis I am going to be working on the other traits; organization and idea development and content.

Tragedy strikes everyone.  It is a sickness that will hit every single person on Earth at least once in their lives.  Sometimes it is simply a human mistake, a long life shaping into reality with death or it’s another human’s fault.  In the story Peace like a River the event that made it a tragedy was another human’s fault.  The story has crisply follows the tragedy plot line. When the family thinks that all bad is complete, it comes roaring back at them like an incoming freight train.

The mode of tragedy starts out with there being a problem.  The setting of the story starts out in the locker room of the football team that dad coaches. While his team heads out to start warming up for the second half of play, dad stays back and talks with one of the coaches for a minute or two.  On his way out he hears some screaming.  He goes over to investigate and finds that two boys are beating a girl inside the girl’s locker room.  Dad steps in just in time. Israel Finch and Tommy Basca were the two kids that were beating the young girl.   

Coming after the problem in the tragedy plot line comes the rise to power.  With the rise to power, the story gets better for the main characters. Everything is going well for the family after the incident involving dad.  They were successful in hunting; getting several birds and eating them. Also the family had a lot of fun at church.     

The tragic flaw of the story is the next part of the mode of tragedy.  So far in Peace like a River the tragic flaw is when Israel Finch and Tommy Basca get revenge on dad and his family when they enter their home at night with guns.  They invade the home and fire several at the family members.  Davy, the oldest found a rifle and shot them both. Once they were both dead the family got out from hiding and found that there was a lot of damage to the home.

The final part of the tragedy plot line is the tragic fall.  Davy who shot them was charged with murder for both of them. Davey then was sent to the town’s jail.  The whole entire town could not believe what was occurring because Davy did nothing wrong. Everything was going downhill. Then a few weeks later dad lost his job as the school janitor at the local school. 

We know that life is a value. You want to live every second with pride and glory.  Tragedy could strike at any time, and everyone will have to learn to handle it. Bad things happen to good people, but that is how life is. This even happens in real life, the police put the wrong people in jail for something that they did not do and it is a tragedy because they made a mistake.

"Peace Like a River by Leif Enger - Reviews, Discussion, Bookclubs, Lists ." Share Book Recommendations With Your Friends, Join Book Clubs, Answer Trivia. N.p., n.d. Web. 8 May 2012. <http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/227571.Peace_Like_a_River>.






4-30-12

Tomato Pickers

Author’s Note:  This is the first writing piece for my 2012 District Writing Assessment.  In this writing piece I am going to be converting a stream of conciseness into a writing piece.  The topic of the stream of conciseness was tomatoes.  Out of the six writing traits.  I am going to be working on three of them, voice, word choice and sentence fluency.

It is fall.  Tomato picking season.  For our family, it is a very stressful time of year.  We need to pick every single tomato that we grew from the course of spring to the end of fall off of the vines.  My dad and I need do this process in two days.  After the lengthy two days a Heinz truck comes to our farm and picks up all of the tomatoes that we grew.  Tomato picking is my favorite time of year, it is the only two days that I miss school and spend time with my dad.

I wake up to the smell of pancakes.  I slip out of bed and into my blue and yellow slippers and grudge down the stairs to where I see my dad making us our farmer’s breakfast.   The famer’s breakfast is made up of pancakes, eggs, bacon, and sausages.  It is meant to fill us up for the entire day because we do not stop during the day to eat lunch or dinner because we only have two days to pick all of the tomatoes off of the vines.  Once I finished my meal, I looked up at the clock.  4:30 is what it read.  The sun does not rise until 5:23 so I have another hour to kill.  I venture my way upstairs and find my tomato picking cloths on my bed.  All it is are a dark pair of pants with lots of holes, and a t-shirt that has our names on it and who we give our tomatoes to.

It is 5:10 in the morning, my dad and I stroll out to the field.  We want to waste no time so we go out a little early to get the supplies ready so we can start as soon as the sun comes out.  The temperature is cool for this time of year.  Today it is going to be 58 degrees and tomorrow it will be even cooler being 49 degrees.   My dad opens our shed and grabs some tools that I have never seen before.  He says “Son, I invested in some of the highest quality tools known to man.  Here is the Tomato Picker 3000” which he handed to me “and there is the Tomato Tractor.  I will use this one” My dad walked up to a tomato and thought me how to operate this machine. He said “you should put the picker right up against the tomato, press the orange button on the side right in.

I tried it once and twice, and it was quite easy.  The way that those tomatoes were flowing into the Picker is quite remarkable.  As the day kept going, it was warming up and I got quite sweaty.   I will be getting lot sweater because our field is as large as big as two football fields and as long as half the state of Rhode Island.  

As the day progresses into the afternoon hours, my dad gets off of his tractor and grabs a tomato picker and joins me in the process of picking with me.  During this time we really catch up on what has happened to each one of us over the course of the past year.  

“Dad” I say

“Ya son” he replies

“There is kind of a problem in soccer these days”  “What kind of problem” said my dad.

“Well, Johnny has been saying/doing some inappropriate things.  And coach just lets him get away with it.”  I complain

“Well” my dad says “You might need confront Johnny and tell that he needs to stop doing that or you need to talk to the coach one on one and telling him that you are bothered by it. “

“But, but” I stutter “That is not always the easiest thing to”

“I know Kevin, but sometimes you have do things that you are not comfortable doing.” My dad states.

As we get back to the picking, I thought about what my dad said to me.

“Sometimes you have do things that you are not comfortable doing”

“Sometimes you have do things that you are not comfortable doing”

As night fell upon us we continued to work, the flaming sun is setting ever so fast over the horizon. 

We had most likely fifteen minutes left to pick tomatoes.  All of the tomatoes go into this jumbo box that is about thirty feet tall and twenty feet wide.  Because there is not much time left in the day, dad went over to the box and turned the counter on and it gave us a number.  On our first day of picking we picked up 7,493 tomatoes.  That is our all-time best!  Our field is made up of 11,284 tomatoes so we need to pick 3,791 tomorrow.  

The next day, we repeated the same old process again, get up and eat the major breakfast.   Our morning paper was delivered very early today.  I only look at the sports section, but today I was bored so I opened the breaking news section.  The headline on the top was ANOTHER KILLED IN METRO AREA.  As I read the article it talked some of the past serial killers in this state.  

“Dad” I said                                                                                                                     

 “Why do people kill people for no apparent reason?”

“Well when this happens it shows the unintelligent side of these people.  Son, I really do not like you learning about all of this a young age” my dad said

“Why” I exclaimed

“Just because, because, never mind. You can learn about this when you get a little older” he stated.

As we got out to the fields for our second day the weather men were very wrong about what the temperature was going to be that day.  It started out crisp and very humid for this type of day.  It was sixty five with a record amount of humidity. 

I walked into the shed and grabbed the Tomato Picker 3000 and put it into use while the scorching sun fried my uncovered skin.  I took the one side of the farm and then my dad took the other.  It did not take us long to finish picking today.  In fact we got done in three hours.  For my dad and I that is a record.  We added up all of our tomatoes from yesterday and today and we got every single tomato which means that we recovered 11,284 tomatoes.  With our new tomato device that we invested in, we can look at how many tomatoes are good and how many are bad.  From the machines calculations over ten thousand of them were good, and if that is true then our sales would have gone up 2.92% from last year which is stellar.

When the Heinz truck pulled up on our gravel driveway, we told the driver the good news.  He was very impressed with the great work that we put in this year to make it our best yet.  We also talked long about all of the tools that we invested in last year.  

“They are very nice tools” said the driver

“Though they do cost some great dough” he said

“

Ya”, my dad said. 

 “But they are a lot faster than all of the picking each one by hand.

Alarmed with the comment the truck driver said “it is great that we can continue to keep doing business with each other.”  Then he climbed into the truck and drove northeast to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

Six Months Later

I love picking season!  It is the one time of year that I actually get to spend with my dad.  Also the joy of being outside for a full two days is a great motive to keep helping my dad with this task.  And best of all, we have a contract that we have with Heinz.  And it states that we receive twelve percent of the ketchup that is made from the tomatoes that we picked.  It puts a good feeling in me when I am eating a burger with the ketchup that our family made and spent time and effort into making, as is goes straight to my stomach.







"Heinz Logo « BRENDAN CUSACK." BRENDAN CUSACK. N.p., n.d. Web. 30 Apr. 2012. <http://www.brendancusack.com/sponsorship/heinz-logo/>.

"Tomatoes Recalled for Salmonella | Personal Injury Lawyer Seattle Personal Injury Blog." Seattle Personal Injury Attorneys | Car Accident Lawyers | Washington | Kirk Bernard Seattle Personal Injury Attorneys. N.p., n.d. Web. 30 Apr. 2012. <http://www.4injured.com/blog/personal-injury/tomatoes-recalled-for-salmonella/>. 




Fall 2011

Author's Note:  This is my first piece as a middle school student.  This is my district writing assessment for the fall of 2011.  Look for voice in this piece.

About two weeks ago, I received a top secret letter saying that I was one of 10 people going on a trip to the Haunted City. The letter had no return address and it was signed by Albert L. And of course it has to take place on October 31^st Halloween.  I currently live in Ransburg, Nebraska.  My name is Ryan O’Conner.  No one else in my school not even my best friend Greg Scott got it. I don’t even know if I will go, but the letter said “If I don’t go the whole haunted city will come up and send them me to their world.  It also said that I have to go alone, which stinks.

We have contacted the government and I said that someone is threatening me with some kind of letter saying that I need to go to Haunted City.  Kevin (the government agent) said that there is no such place, and we shouldn’t go because there is no other world besides ours.  He asked if we wanted him to come to us and travel to (Haunted City) with me.  I told him that I was only a loud to go on my own.  “Who cares” Kevin said “ I am going with you”. “Do you want me to report it to the News?”  “ No “I said.  “Great I will be over on the 30^th.

I am walking to school with Greg and I am telling this story to him and he is still giving me the same advice every single day, “Don’t go you might die.”  (I hope that that doesn’t happen.) The school is decorated with ghosts and all of the fun Halloween stuff.  But, I might encounter the real thing in about 48 hours.  For first hour we have a class gathering, celebrating the 550^th Anniversary of the Holliday.  I’m not thrilled at all.  Half way through the class gathering Principal Mr. Steven calls me down to his office.  Going to Mr. Stevens office is one of the worst things that could happen to anything at Ransburg Middle School. 

When I got down to his office he told that I need to leave school right away.  “Why” I asked.  “There is a government agent at you home and you need to meet with him right away.  When he called he told me that you needed to leave school right away. So I went to my locker (hopefully not for the last time), got my things and when I stepped out of school. There was a black limo that was going to take me home. 

When I got home I was asked about a billion questions.   Really I would just want to be at boring school.  I told him that the letter said that there is a private jet for me and that I am the only one that is aloud on it. After a long silence Kevin said “Well, I can get a government jet out here and I can fly it as close to your jet as I can.”  I replied “Ok I guess that will work.”  Kevin stated “Great, I will make all the arrangements.  Where are you flying out of?” “Omaha International Airport.” I answered. “Ok, I will send the plane out here tonight.” Kevin said.

I got to the airport at 10:28 AM.  I was wearing my favorite shirt the Mt. Rushmore shirt I got last Christmas. I had to go through all the fun stuff like secretary and all of that.  My flight left at 12:09 heading southeast, and shortly after Kevin and his plane took off.  We flew over Lincoln, Nebraska, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, Dallas, Texas and over Houston, Texas.   It seemed like we were never going to stop.  Once we were in the middle of the ocean the pilot called on the loud speaker and said that I would need to skydive into Haunted City.  He also said I would be doing this in less than 10 minutes.  

I immediately called Kevin on my Droid LX phone and told him what was happening.  I told him, that I have to jump out of the plane in 10 minutes.  5 MINUTES 5 MINUTES repeated the captain.  “I got to go” I shouted and I hung up.   There was all this gear for me sitting on the seats.  There was a snorkel, scuba gear, an oxygen tank and a parachute.  When 20 Seconds arrived, there was a countdown.  The captain opened the side door of the plane and I jumped out just when the clock went to zero. 

I was free falling for about 10 seconds and then I opened my parachute, and floated down to the open water.  I got out all of the gear that I needed to get down there.  I got all of it on and then dove under the water.   I was using my snorkel and scuba gear when I spotted another kid.  I swan over and told him to come up to the surface with me.  When were up I asked him his name and he told me that his name was Devin.  I also asked him if he was looking for Haunted City and he said yes too.  I asked him “so do you want to look for Haunted City with me?”  “Sure” Devin replied and then we went under the cold water again. 

We didn’t have to swim for long, about a half mile in we saw a box and it had a key pad to it.  We pressed enter,  and what came up was the word  NAME.  I typed my name in and hit enter.  A door opened up and I got sucked in.  Devin did it next and he also got sucked in.

After I got sucked in I fell into this very deep whole. I probably fell about 5,000 feet and I landed on this pile of lots of hay.  About 30 seconds later Devin fell.  It was a strange silence until someone was speaking to us on the loud speaker. He said “Greetings my friends and welcome to Haunted City. You names please” I said “Ryan and Devin”  “Great, said the guy on the microphone.”  After all of the talking we got up and started walking around.  We saw a door and Devin grabbed it, turned the knob and when he opened it and we saw lots of ghosts and creepy things. We quickly closed the door. Right after that the floor dropped out from underneath us and we fell into this made up city of ghosts and scarecrows.   I looked just like any other city only creepier. 

Devin and I ran into a store where they were selling ghost mobiles.  They were just like motorcycles but they are not for humans, they are for creepy people.  We asked the cashier where we were, he said “You are in Haunted City he said. You guy look like humans correct.” “Yes” we said. “Well you guys need to go to the Monster Hotel. Jeff will be there and you will take a test and that will decide if you need to take the Haunted Adventure or if you hang against your  will while sharks try to bite your legs off.  But first you have to take the test.”  “Who is Jeff?” I asked.  “He is the guy that you should have heard on the PA system when you got there.”  “Where is the Monster Hotel?”  Devin asked.  “You go two blocks down then you turn left on Candy Street , and then you walk all the way down the street and it is the last building on you right.” The cashier said. 

Devin and I walked down the Skull Avenue, there was all of this Halloween stuff up and everyone in the city was in a very good mood.  We turned on to Candy Street and sure enough there it was.  We walked in and asked for Jeff.   The attendant guy got on the phone and called Jeff down.  He told us “Jeff will be down in a minute.  So you guys can wait in those chairs till he comes.”  Devin and I picked two chairs to sit in.  He was in a black and red one and I was in an all red one.  About two minutes later Jeff came down and told us to follow him into his conference room.  He opened the door and in front of us there were 8 kids.

We all introduced ourselves, after that we were invited to eat in the other conference room.  We all got up and walked with Jeff to the Food Room.  We sat down next to Noah.  I asked him where he was from and he said “Tama Bay, Florida” He asked me where I was from and I told him I was from “Ransburg, Nebraska.”  After that we were given ribs, steak, pizza, and Cheeseburgers.  I gobbled down 4 burgers, 3 ribs, 1pound of steak and 12 slices of pizza.  Following our meal Jeff handed out the test to us. He told us that we will hang against our will with sharks trying to bite our legs off our, go on the Haunted Adventure. (All stuff that Devin and I have already heard.)  I looked at the test and it is 42 questions long. Jeff stated “When you are ready begin.” And I flipped the cover page question one.   

The test was very easy it was just simple questions about Halloween.  When I went to turn it in Jeff told me that you need to get more that 30 questions right to go on the Adventure.  I was frightened; I closed my eyes and crossed my fingers as he scanned it.  After the noise was done I opened my eyes and he handed my paper back to me and I looked at it and it showed a 35 on it. 

I was blessed after that.  I prayed to God and thanked him for giving me this opportunity of doing well and to help me get out of here as soon as possible.  Jeff also told me to tell no one else my score because he didn’t want anyone to know how anyone else did.  I sat down and glanced at the ceiling.   It was very boring sitting there waiting of the others to be done.  Finally, about a half hour later everyone was completed with the test. 

We sat in silence of five minutes and then Jeff said. “Sadly only 3 of you passed the test.  They are Ryan O’ Conner, Greg Slob, and Michael Hoots.  The rest of you are going to be strung up by your waist and be held against your death for 10 hours.  If you are still alive after that, then you get to go home.   The other three of you get to go on the Adventure with me. First we will do the 7 of you with the great beasty sharks.  We will be going to the Haunted City’s Center. 

We walked out of the hotel and down a couple of streets to the Haunted City Area. There is a giant pool about 100 feet wide and 200 feet deep full of the beasts.   Jeff called over the 7 kids over and told them that Peter will hook them up to and then tie them to the ropes.  They followed Peter up 11 flights of steps to the harnesses.  He hooked up each and every one of them and then told them. “You are going to leap off all at once on his count.  You guys will land about 15 feet short of the water.  The sharks could jump out of the water and hit any of you at any minute.  You will be out there for 10 hours.  If the one of the sharks bites your leg off, well, you will most likely die.  Are you ready” Peter stated “Yes” all of the kids replied.  “One, two, three jump!!!” shouted Peter.   And they all jumped.

They all fell for about 10 seconds and then they snapped into place.  They just talked and talked for the first hour.  Everything was fine until one of them jumped out and missed Devin by about 6 inches.  He got soaked but nothing bad happened.  Jeff said that we were going to the Adventure not.

We took a ghost jet to this top secret area of the city.  We were all searched for weapons and objects like that.  The guard said that they are searching us because they don’t want to wreak the course. “Simple instructions go through the maize without screaming and you pass, you go home.  If you scream you die” said the leader of the Adventure. “Ok we all said.  We were lead into an elevator and went down 42 floors to the Adventure room.  The doors opened up and there was the Adventure room. 

We started walking in the pitch black until this red light came on and there was blood all on the floor.  I could barely hold it in, and sure enough there was a fake dead person who pretended got shot.  We rounded the bend and there were lots of ghosts and I really thought I heard someone scream, but I didn’t.  Lights were going on and off on the sides as if there were street lamps.  After we got past the ghosts it was pitch black, until this gigantic light came on and Frankenstein character came walking right towards us.  We all stayed calm as he was moving towards us.  I ran to the right and the other two ran left.  The monster grabbed Greg, picked him up and pinned him up against the wall as if he was about to beat him up. In addition to that Greg started screaming.  The monster put him down and the floor dropped down from his feet and there went Greg.

 

After Greg vanished, the monster just went away. It was just the two of us alone in the dark creepy room, with no lights, and who knows where there are eerie objects.  Once all of that happened we kept walking around the bend until we met this gigantic hallway.  We waited for about two minutes, just staring at the darkness in front of us.  Finally we started walking.  We were about half way down the hallway when something jumped on each of our backs.  We both shook them off and kept walking.  We were almost done when this huge light came on and blinded us.  Lots of terrifying people were coming towards us, and very loud music was playing.  I couldn’t take it anymore so I let out a scream.  The people got off me and floor opened up and I fell down and down and landed on a stack of pumpkins. 

When I fell, I landed flat on pumpkins. I clearly felt the pain throughout my body.  A few minutes later, after I hit the pumpkins Michael came down.  He miserably landed on his head.  He was bleeding and I thought he was going to pass away, until someone came in.  He introduced himself as Albert L.  He was holding a first- aid kit. He fixed up Michael and it doesn’t even look like he fell and hit his head. “Why are you doing this?” Michael asked “You wrote us this mean letter and now you are helping us.  I don’t get it.” “Yes it is true I wrote all of those letters to you guys.  I only do it because I want to keep my job here in the city.  It is my favorite place in the world.” Albert said “Can you get us out of here” I whispered.  “I can try; I think I know a way follow me.”  Albert exclaimed

Michael and I followed Albert to his submarine.  We climbed aboard, he told us to sit as far back as possible because we need to even the weight out.  He started it up and we were off.  He had to open a gate that let some water in and then we were out.  We were floating in the crisp blue water.  The ride was nice and relaxing until something hit us. I didn’t quite know what is it was until Albert shouted that were have been hit by Jeff. 

We were all hesitating and didn’t know what to do; I saw a roll of tape on the floor of the submarine.  I grabbed it and unwound some and put it on the hole. It didn’t work fully, but we were rising, sort of.  We finally got to the surface, along with that Albert popped the hood of the submarines and it turned into an amazing blue and red boat.  It only took it about two seconds for it to start up and we were going at least 60 miles per hour.

We speed into this launch on the southern coast of Texas. The three of us got out of the boat and sprinted away from the boat and towards a little town called Blackville. On the way some guy offered us a ride and we took it any day.  We just wanted to get away from Jeff as fast as we could.   When we got to the Police station, we told the guy in charge that someone was after us.  He police interviewed Albert and asked him what was going on.  “This guy, he has been after me forever, he has followed me around for the past five years.”  After about a five minute meeting we were escorted to the nearest town which was eight miles away.  We climbed in the cop and we were driven away.  We were driven about 12 miles to Hattiesburg, Texas.  The police officer let us out and we were on our way.  I found the nearest pay phone and called my mom. “Hello” my mom said “Hi mom it is Ryan.” “Oh my god where have you been, are you ok, where are you.” Mom shouted. “I am fine and I am in Hattiesburg, Texas.” I said. “Where is that” my mom asked? “It is only 25 miles southeast of Houston.”   Great dad will fly down tomorrow.  Love you” my mom stated and she hung up.

The next day, I reunited with my dad in Hattiesburg. He was so happy to see me.  He was hugging me, and just thanking god that I’m safe.  We flew home to Omaha the next day on Southwest flight number 562.  My mom meet us at the airport, and when she saw me she was weeping and screaming as she ran up to hug me.  It was one of the best days of my life when I returned home, and I hope that something like this never happens again.

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